NOTES FOR MUM, 25 Nov 2024

Barbara Deacon's parents were Fred, who fought at Ypres and who came from a farming family in Lincolnshire, and Ivy Hoyes, a lady's maid, who lived in Whitwick. For a time they both worked at the big house in Burton-on-the-Wolds, which is where they met. They were married in 1926 and ran a farm for several years;  they had three children. Barbara was born on 13 May 1932 at Belton, Loughborough; she was the youngest child and had a brother Don and sister Joan.

Barbara started school in Belton in 1937. The family left the farm and moved around quite a lot. Barbara transferred to Sileby school, which she left at age 14.  Her first job was for the War Office, doing administrative work; this was 1946 and rationing was still in place. She trained in shorthand and typing, which became very useful to her; her next job was as a secretary with a company which made fishing nets amonst other things: Ratby Engineering, which started in Ratby and then moved to Peckleton Common.

It was there that Barbara met her future husband David, who was working in the drawing office,  on a day in June 1951 when he asked her to go to the pictures. Her diary doesn't say what they watched, but she'd seen 'Clochmerle' four days earlier so it probably wasn't that. The day after the cinema, David took her on his motorbike to Matlock for the day, and soon they were meeting regularly and visiting the dales and other interesting places. He even showed her how to turn wood on a lathe.  

They were married at St. Peter's church in Glenfield in Mar 1955. They had three children: Nigel in 1957, Ralph in 1960 and Geoffrey in 1964. Their first home was in Narborough; they moved to Sutton in the Elms in 1962, where Barbara lived for over 60 years. 


***Barbara liked playing the piano, and enjoyed listening to Nigel's folktune settings. You've already heard one of them; here's another - The Three Ravens. As it plays, you can recall your favourite memories of Barbara. 

(Nigel's piano piece, The Three Ravens)


Mum went back to work in 1970; her first job was one day a week at Leicester Cattle Market in the settling office, dealing with 'Fat Pigs'; she loved meeting the farmers and talking to them. She vividly remembered a farmer talking to her with his coat fixed with a six inch nail because his buttons had come off. 

She was also busy one day a week assisting at Riding for the Disabled at Great Glen.

At this stage, Nigel, Ralph and Geoff were all helping on local farms in their spare time; the farms all had cows, poultry and grew potatoes and corn. 



In June 1976 Mum started work as secretary and P.A. to the director of Leicestershire Association for the Disabled on Greyfriars Rd, Leicester. She met many well-known people, including the Corahs, who owned a big hosiery factory in Leicester, and on one occasion, the famous fighter pilot Douglas Bader.

And forty years later, when Leicester City did so well and the remains of King Richard were discovered, she was astonished to find that her parking place for 18 years was on the EXACT spot where his body had been interred by the monks at the Greyfriars Priory after the battle of Bosworth. 

This wasn't her only brush with royalty; towards the end of her time working for the disabled she attended a garden party at Buckingham Palace.

In retirement, Barbara enjoyed seeing her grandchildren Richard and Sarah. She was a wonderful granny and a familiar face to both teachers and parents at Claybrooke Primary School. She was a loving grandmother to Geoff's stepdaughter Amelia and great- grandmother to Lukas, Sebby, Keira and Lewis (Louis). 

Barbara worked as a volunteer at the Age Concern shop in Lutterworth for 25 years, starting when she left full-time work and finishing when she was 88. For most of the time she drove to the shop; when she could no longer drive she used the bus or was taken by a member of the family and bussed back. She made some good friends on the staff, and to celebrate her 25 years, her colleagues clubbed together to buy some garden furniture; she used it every morning the sun was out, sitting at the table, drinking her coffee, listening to the birds.


Now we have another musical interlude - another of Nigel's folktune settings:

*** (Searching for Lambs)


Throughout life and in retirement, Barbara's passion was walking; she had an encyclopedic knowledge of walks in all parts of England, but particularly Leicestershire, Devon and North Wales. In her youth she went youth hostelling with her sister Joan, cycling long distances. 

She attended night classes in Spanish for several years and when the class folded they group continued to meet privately to practice their Spanish conversation. Barbara went to Spain time after time. She preferred going alone because it meant she could do what she wanted; she she could chat to the locals, who were more willing to talk to people on their own. 

She also went to Ceaucesku's Romania and was both delighted and appalled by what she saw. Shops selling foul-smelling butter wrapped in pieces of brown paper; women in worn-out shoes mending the roads; armed police watching people when they alighted from buses and trains. But the people were lovely, and so was the countryside. 

Barbara was interested to learn a couple of years ago that Nigel and Alison have radio drama friends from Timisoara. Alex's father was one of the leaders of the 1989 revolution. One of their jokes ... why are the shops in Romania all three miles apart? Answer - to prevent the queues getting mixed up. 

Barbara rang Nigel once from Ireland whilst he was at work teaching a class; she'd got lost on a remote country lane in her car and the roads were full of potholes and she was going from village to village looking for somewhere to stay the night. She'd found a call box in the middle of nowhere and thought he'd like a phone call! The class didn't mind too much, and she managed to get to Killarney before it got dark.

There was another occasion when a bomb went off outside her B&B in Spain when she was 79; it blew her off her feet and she broke her wrist; the locals took her to the hospital and had to set her wrist before she could come home. But she was back in Spain again a few months later.

Barbara was a talented artist; she liked sketching from life rather than from pictures. Drawing what was in front of her was an important part of the experience. 

She kept her garden in great condition for 60 years, played the piano, and enjoyed listening to piano music and good male tenors, including Elvis. She was always interested in Richard's farming activities, even if she kept saying 'you've got too many sheep'.

She liked radio dramas. She rang Nigel up in 2022 immediately after The Song of the Cossacks, a play about the Yalta Agreement, and the dilemma of ordinary army officers ordered to betray the people whose trust they had gained. 'That was stunning' she said .... 'make sure you tell the writer how good it was'.

Barbara kept driving until she was 82 and her eyesight started to deteriorate. She had loyal friends who would take her out, and good neighbours who would call in for coffee and a chat. The family are extremely grateful for the loyalty and friendship given to their mother.

Last but not least, we thank Cherry Tree Care Home for the loving care, friendship and compassion she experienced over her last 14 months. 

Rest in Peace, Barbara. In the words of the family ... 'a light has gone out in our lives but you would not want us to be sad. You are part of what we are and part of what we will become'.